Summer can be a lot of things.
For students, it’s the time to breathe. Maybe it’s going home and spending time with family. Maybe it’s taking off and traveling the world. Maybe it’s working a temporary job to raise some money for the school year.
For real people, it’s just like the rest of the year. Except, it’s hotter. Sure, maybe it’s cashing in on vacation time, or going to any of the million weddings that are happening in the warm months. Maybe it’s picking up an outdoor hobby, like gardening; as a real person, I assume they would have a place to garden and the spare time to do it.
I don’t know, because I’m not a real person yet. The kicker is that I’m not a student either. I’m in the DMZ that is the summer after graduation, and I wasn’t given the handbook on how to deal with the stopgap this summer has become. It’s become this frenzied job hunt, while still maintaining a grasp on my sanity in a comfortable internship that I have already done. Honestly, that’s the best way to describe how it feels: when faced with the unknown, I hold what I know close (with clenched fists, because I am not about to let it go). So, in the waiting game of this summer, I have found myself taking refuge in what I already know and love.
For anyone who has held an informal conversation with me, it’s pretty obvious that I’m talking about television shows and movies. Instead of raptly following guilty-pleasure, summer shows (like I have been known to do), I find myself gravitating toward my beloved DVD collection. Rather than taking in new story lines and getting to know new characters, I am watching Frozen and You’ve Got Mail on repeat.
In the same vein, I recently rewatched Gilmore Girls in its entirety. Yes, all seven seasons were watched and adored by me yet another time in my life. Of course, now the seventh season hit me particularly hard as a recent graduate. The series finale is essentially a big party for the young grad of the show, sending her off to her promising future. I saw her struggle through her post-grad crisis, trying to make good on all the promises she made to herself and her support system by becoming a real person with a real career. It hit close to home in a way that the show never had before.
As I get closer to the end of my internship, I keep sending out resumes and biting my nails in anticipation. The longer I go without hearing, the more anxious I get. Even with friends and family checking in with love and support, it’s hard. The waiting game is no fun, especially when I have no clue what will happen on the other side.
It’s like the Nothing from The Neverending Story. There’s no real idea of what is coming, it’s just…coming. It can’t be stopped. It won’t be stopped. (Thanks, Miley.) It’s this uncertainty that drives me back to my comfort zone and the brief peace it can bring. With equal parts dread and excitement for the future, I’ll be here. I think it’s time for a Fred and Ginger marathon…